Another joke for you?

In the beginning God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, with green, yellow and red vegetables of all kinds so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.








But Satan was crafty and created Dairy Ice Cream. He asked innocently %26quot;You want hot fudge with that? and Man said %26quot;Yes!%26quot; And Woman said %26quot;I%26#039;ll have one too with chocolate chips%26quot;. And lo, they gained 10 pounds.











And God created the healthy yoghurt that woman might keep the figure that man found so fair. So Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat and sugar and combined them.











And Woman went from size 10 to size 14.





So God said %26quot;Try my fresh green salad%26quot;. But Satan presented Blue Cheese dressing and garlic croutons on the side.











And Man and Woman had to unfasten their belts following the feast. God then said %26quot;I have sent you healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them%26quot;.











But Satan brought forth deep fried coconut king prawns, butter-dipped lobster chunks and chicken fried steak, so big it needed its own platter, and Man%26#039;s cholesterol went through the roof.





God then brought forth running shoes so that his Children might lose those extra pounds.











So Satan came forth with a cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels.





God sighed ......... and created quadruple by-pass surgery.











Then . Satan chuckled and created the National Health Service.











THE FINAL WORD ON NUTRITION











After an exhaustive review of the research literature, here%26#039;s the final word on nutrition and health.:











1. Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.











2. Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.











3. Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.











4. Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.











5. Germans drink beer and eat lots of sausages and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.











CONCLUSION:











Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

Another joke for you?
That is just toooooo fun-nay!...I%26#039;m PIMP (peeing in my pants) already!!!!!!!





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Reply:very funny loved it.....now how do you say that in italian?
Reply:lol...after that long explanations.......
Reply:that was awesome.
Reply:Hahaha nice.
Reply:Lmao! Nice hahaha i havn%26#039;t laughed like that in a while lmao im crying abit haha..Have a star tops. ROFL
Reply:I likd d punchline....good one
Reply:hahaha good one....
Reply:Pretty funny! 8/10!
Reply:sweet haha
Reply:finally


u concluded


it would have been better i9f u have concluded saying....


...................and then %26quot;Satan created me%26quot;
Reply:cute
Reply:that was a good one.
Reply:funny and educational--- witty
Reply:whoa..cool!
Reply:Love it!





Thanks for the tip...
Reply:lmao!!!!!! that was so funny! rofl!!
Reply:i likes! i likes!!!
Reply:xtremeley long


but i smiled in the end



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