Heres one for the ladies funny or true?

Q. How are husbands like lawn mowers?


A. They%26#039;re hard to get started, they emit noxious odours, and half the time they don%26#039;t work.





Q. How can you tell when a man is well hung?


A. When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.





Q. How do men define a %26quot;50/50%26quot; relationship?


A. We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.





Q. How do men exercise on the beach?


A. By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.





Q. How do you get a man to stop biting his nails?


A. Make him wear shoes.





Q. How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?


A. Rename the mail folder %26quot;Instruction Manuals.%26quot;





Q. How does a man show he%26#039;s planning for the future?


A. He buys two cases of beer instead of one.





Q. How is Colonel Sanders like the typical male?


A. All he%26#039;s concerned with is legs, breasts and thighs.





Q. What do most men consider a gourmet restaurant?


A. Any place without a drive-up window.





Q. What do you call a handcuffed man?


A. Trustworthy.





Q. What do you call the useless piece of skin on the end of a man%26#039;s penis?


A. His body.





Q. What makes a man think about a candlelight dinner?


A. A power failure.





Q. What should you give a man who has everything?


A. A woman to show him how to work it.





Q. What do men and mascara have in common?


A. They both run at the first sign of emotion.





Q. What do men and pantyhose have in common?


A. They either cling, run, or don%26#039;t fit right in the crotch!





Q. What do you instantly know about a well-dressed man?


A. His wife is good at picking out clothes.





Q. What%26#039;s a man%26#039;s definition of a romantic evening?


A. Sex.





Q. What%26#039;s a man%26#039;s idea of honestly in a relationship?


A. Telling you his real name.





Q. What%26#039;s the best way to force a man to do sit ups?


A. Put the remote control between his toes.





Q. What%26#039;s the difference between Big Foot and intelligent man?


A. Big Foot%26#039;s been spotted a several times.





Q. What%26#039;s the smartest thing a man can say?


A. %26quot;My wife says...%26quot;





Q. Why can%26#039;t men get mad cow disease?


A. Because they%26#039;re all pigs.





Q. Why do men like smart women?


A. Opposites attract.

Heres one for the ladies funny or true?
lmao *
Reply:Lmao Lol
Reply:haha so funny!!


but too harsh for the men. lol
Reply:Funny.


LOL.
Reply:funny, not always true :-)
Reply:old... some are good :)
Reply:hahahaha those are hilarious. I guess you know him then. pmsl



Hotel Silvota